Surfing on the edge of the note

Surfing on the edge of the note * A lot of energy wonder what the future holds for you? * Oscillating not sure that you are in transition to worrying that you are a neurotic to declare firmly that life is beautiful and it is better not even think of rocking the proverbial boat? * Find muttering, "I do not know" (and what you want) on your work, creative passion, or purpose of life? * A deep sense of production change rumbling under the surface - a new phase to be birthed? * Conceed that if we do not keep pushing you never know, do not go forward or not with your life? You can browse only the edge of the note, as in transition, a metamorphosis (the cocoon stage), the I-have-no-idea-who-I-AM "or" what-you-I level. Why do you like surf on the edge of the known? Because what you have known at least one area of your life is no longer enough to where you go next, even if you do not have idea where that is. You are invited to navigate carefully and wisely board and ride the waves into the unknown of interest to answer the call to your desire. Sounds romantic and exciting - and it can be. It can also be hell on the ego, wildly confusing grindingly long, and surprisingly lonely. Why me? Here you can cry. All the others seem happy and confident for his life working towards or intimate relationship or creative invitation. The hard truth is, you are invited, and the price of conscience is not convenient. Are you willing to pay? How to play? If you say no, and all of us, at least for the first time, be aware: You will be asked again. And again. And then again. It may, however, as always in a transition phase. Technology has increased the frequency of transition in our lives. Weste adults to be expected that three careers in their lifetime. Few find strange, at least in the United States, to retu to school, if they are 35 or 52 or 81, a company and sell a new or a new artistic discipline. The divorce rate of 50% moves. People on average every 5 years. It seems that the transitions are here to stay, and it would behoove us all to lea how to negotiate them with dignity, competence, and even a smidgen of grace. Here are the ideas that have worked for me and my teaching partner Master Coach Molly Gordon, and hundreds of our customers and retirement parties. 1. Confirming the move. How many of us to pretend that everything is the same, if something within us cries out: "This no longer works. Un po 'di change! "If you cling to the family, we live in the definition of insanity: Keep the same thing and expect something different. If the car stops and you keep moving, this is nothing, I do not justify anywhere until you see the breakdown. Nothing can change until you see something more, something new will be in, and then something that is no longer sufficient. 2nd Remember you know. The nature of a transition that does not know. Often, you do not know what you do not know. The confusion is really a good sign (repeatedly, even). Try to know, too soon can be a spiritual being and leaing of deadlock. Not to mention crippling, misleading, and a good way of perfectionism and procrastination. Instead, train your mind to be more comfortable with not knowing. Practice to recognize the unknown - Jouey to the end, like a work project, what the capital of Uzbekistan. Of 'high at least once a day, "I do not know." Just the things that make you think, you know, try the words: "I do not know if I could," or "I do not know if I am wise . "gratitude" I do not know "as an option vesting mood, the mood of leaing. Leaing is why the transitions available! 3rd Keeping faith trust. Question: What criteria can be used to restore the confidence in me during this time of committing not to know? "Authentic trust, if you know that there is the possibility of betrayal. It is the confidence of knowing that when he broke a promise or commitment is open, you can use the appropriate and effective. Authentic trust is a dynamic process of development and part of the relationship that needs constant care, "said Master Coach Julio Olalla is defined trust.When stumble through a fog bank of personal confusion, acknowledge that the possibility for itself, there is betrayal. Do not tu away from this, because if you do, you fall into a blind trust - trust without parameters, but the conditions of satisfaction - and from here it's so tempting to tu in faulty assumptions, unfounded assessments, magical thinking: true darkness the crater (the last year). Creating the conditions for committing himself to the trust. When I ask my daughter to choose tent caterpillars before blueberry bushes every day, but not with its check-in, are blind to his trust. That does not mean that I have no confidence in its intentions, it's just they need help implementing their intentions. The same goes for you. If you opt for a half hour every moing to seek guidance on its future, how will you support? Where have you been fuzzy or blind to your obligation to be heard before? What or who waylay you? If you need to stretch or strengthen in order to follow? Or, if you declare that you have a graphic design and, of course, in the past, you have fear, but then was in and out, what will help you trust in the process this time? What should be different? Who can support you? Be very specific! Name in writing, what steps you can take to restore confidence when you betray yourself. As you work? How are you with compassion and honesty with oneself? See the monster directly in the face. 4th Design generative stories. We all live in stories - is how our brains sense our world through the construction of linear stories. We all love stories. The problemis only if we believe that our stories are the truth or if our stories, our world smaller and stingier gommone. You have the right to play with his interpretation, that the fear, uncertainty and confusion is a sign that you are on the wrong track or that you are completely screwed. Instead, you can draft a story that is moving into a new phase of development, the discovery of another layer of vitality to the creation of a conscience and a satisfactory life. One might ask: "How do I take the development of new capabilities to express my gifts to the world? "and" What procedures help with research and that of my next step? "Alteatively, you can use the hypothesis that the unsubstantiated story that you're an idiot, the better our heads in the sand and keep the same thing or the sky falls. Your choice. Was certainly nervous when Christopher Columbus would drop onto the edge of the known world. Why should we not fear, when we started to do something new, especially if we do not know what this new thing, or if we do it? Care fear and ready to jump out of your skin is a normal reaction to change. Recognize as such. Be curious to hear your stories, interpretations and evaluations, because being uncomfortable is bad or wrong. Why? What is the difference between fear and excitement? The sensations of our bodies are very similar. 5th Think about what you need to lea. A few years ago, Toni posted on this message boards: "I think I have finally found the reason why I am so terribly stuck on the photograph. I have my classical treatment money does not apologize for the photos: they are not valid. The reason why I hesitated to clear my camera is old style, lack of technical experience! I'm not sure how I'm setting the camera is correct. I know this sounds really basic and like a big ol 'DUH, but honestly have not yet occurred to me until yesterday. "I made progress with a" good eye "in the darkroom, a good press, and I just assumed I knew all I need. In fact, I had to miss a key part of the leaing process. What happens when I resumed my camera, they are completely paralyzed. My lack of training is the one that was with me back! "Notice how many new possibilities open to Toni when she asks:" What do I need to lea about us? "In the story", I would already know how. See how long I do it. "Also, keep in mind as something that has closed or defeat Toni was a mature new direction. How many times have our own transitions, shoulding of refusing to lea from us? 6. Pressing the Stop River. Therefore, this article will give you the idea, you should immediately run and make your transition to happen, please remember that these changes have a rhythm of its own. I feel the rhythm. When everything in you is screaming for the time to slow down, then slow down. You may think that this will have to know what is next, but he is mistaken. The fastest way through the fog, lost time is always too slow and feel, feel, with what is, moment by moment. Only then can you say what is required of you and the best way to surf on the edge of the world. 7th Be Kind to yourself. Please. They are not bad or broken or thick. They are wonderful people and shared, and called to something more complex and satisfying. Find others who can talk about them. Join us for a retreat or tele-class. Find a friend or an online community to help you feel less alone. Trust your inner knowledge - which is really reliable and loving. All you have to do is calm enough to listen.